Sorry for the misleading title. There’s absolutely no way you can attend the annual Game Developers Conference in San Francisco on a dollar a day unless you engage in a list of unsavoury activities, including but not limited to trespassing, mugging, and impersonating a Valve employee (which is apparently a capital offense in California due to a strange legal precedent set in 2001).

There are, as i’ve discovered, ways to get here by hemorrhaging less money than usual, which i will presently document for your reading pleasure:

1. Alumnus/Early Bird pass pricing.

This is an obvious one, and it requires a little advance planning and foresight. If you’ve ever attended GDC and are on the conference’s mailing list, a few months prior to the event you’ll be offered a special discount price. For the rest of us plebes, there’s the early bird price, which cuts off a month and a half before the event. The difference in an all-access pass at the regular price and the early bird price is around five hundred bucks, so it’s worth your while to plan a trip to GDC in advance.

2. Volunteer program.

A great option for students and hobos, the volunteer program requires you to write an essay or two on why you’re a worthy charity case. If you’re accepted into the program, you’re required to pull twenty hours of “stand around in a pink shirt duty” before you’re given a free all-access pass, though i’m not sure how much of the conference is left to be seen once you’ve sunk your twenty hours. The program also heavily subsidizes your accommodations by reducing, for example, a $275/night room at the San Francisco Hilton down to $50/night. The hitch is that you might have to share a queen-sized bed with another volunteer whom you’ve never met. This, in my opinion, is an excellent way to make new contacts and form fast friendships. Call it up close and personal networking.

“Where’s your other hand?”

“Between two pillows.”

“THOSE AREN’T PILLOWS!!!!”

Cue hilarity.

3. Off-peak airline deals.

i ran into one delegate who had purchased an unlimited air travel package from Air Canada for the sum of - i think - $1600? This enabled him to fly anywhere in North America, weekends and Tuesdays only, for two months. Unlimited. That’s what i call “a steal”. Almost literally. It’s like he’d put an airplane in his pocket and tried to smuggle it out of the airport.

4. Media credentials.

Like most other big conferences, if you’re able to prove your media credentials, you can get a conference pass for free. i’ve never tried for one, though i’m sure i could qualify. If it’s anything like E3 used to be, you have only to kick up a fan blog a few months prior to the event to lay claim to a pass. Indeed, i hope it’s a little more difficult than that, otherwise GDC may turn into what E3 had become at its most bloated: a fan convention for tourists.

5. The OMDC Export Fund.

Of interest only to Ontario game and new media companies, the Ontario Media Development Corporation’s Export Fund subsidizes a good part of your trip in exchange for … your mortal soul? i’m not sure. i haven’t looked into it. But it’s possible that if you live in Iowa or Behrain or some place without a booming game-based economy, your local government is looking to create a booming game-based economy, so ask around. Free money never hurt anyone. Unless that money was rolled into wads and packed into your rectum in a heavily-lubricated condom so that you could mule it over the Turkish border. Sources say that hurts quite a bit, thank you very much.

6. Contests and events.

Some folks i know received a little help with their trip last year by entering their game into a competition that was featured during the conference. i don’t know the details, but i do know that many of these contests and awards have some of the longest lead times in advance of the conference, so if you hope to cut costs for next year, start designing your indie game masterpiece now.